A Day at the Pool
by SkyminSlash
Summary: It's a scorching summer day in July and the generator producing electricity to the RED's base gets fried from the heat, leaving them with no power. With no means of cooling themselves off, they all decide to head off to the local pool for the day. With nine mercenaries visiting a public pool, hilarity is sure to ensure.


**A/N: This story is the result of spending the entire summer at the pool. Your mind starts to wander when there's nothing to do.**

**This story kind of ties in with my other story, "The New Arrival." The difference's being that some of the characteristics and actions are just a tiny bit different, but only with the Soldier and Pyro really.**

**Note: The swim trunks they wear are more modern day style. Probably should have researched more, but I felt it to be easier to picture them in modern day swim suits.**

**Special thanks to my friend who gave me the idea for what the Pyro wears. You know who you are.**

* * *

**A Day at the Pool**

* * *

Teufort, being a town located in the middle of the New Mexico desert, was hot to say the least. Summer's consisted of sweat, hallucinations, and lots of consumed water thanks to the many heat waves. Temperatures always staggered around 100 degrees, which proved unbearable to all that lived there, especially the mercenaries of RED.

The mercenaries always had to fight in the scorching sun no matter what. Though there had been many complaints, mostly from the Scout, the Administrator was never one to cancel a fight. Missions always went on as scheduled, no matter what kind of weather was happening. Thunderstorms, and more commonly, heat waves, were what the mercenaries had to endure.

During heat waves, the Medic constantly had to treat his fellow teammates for heat stroke, especially the Scout. Running around dodging enemy fire for a long period of time, caused the mercenaries energy to be drained rather quickly. During the battles, 8 of them, excluding the Pyro, all wanted to take a quick breathers, but if they did, they would receive a nice scolding and punishment from the Administrator. Punishment from the Administrator was enough motivation not to perform an action, even if it was one that they desperately needed.

During the heat of the battles, the mercenaries eventually found out that it was a good idea to fall into the trench full of sewer water that lied beneath the bridge connecting the two bases. They began to purposefully fall of the edge and into the water below for a quick cool off. None of the men, except the Spy, minded that it was sewer water. All that mattered was that it was nice cool water.

Unfortunately, this method didn't last long. After sitting in the sun for about two weeks, the water began to heat up. The water became almost as hot as the weather around it, now making it a punishment to fall into the once refreshing water below. The RED's began avoiding the sewers at all cost, which cause them to change their battle strategies.

The entire month of July, wave after waves of heat blew through Teufort. Every day, the temperature reached above 100 degrees, causing their battles to become long and dragged out. No one wanted to fight in the blistering heat, but they knew they had to.

The weekends consisted of everyone sleeping late, even the Soldier. They attempted to regain their energy for the upcoming week, but two days of sleeping in was not enough to replenish what the sun had taken away for five days straight.

On a Saturday in July, the mercenaries were lying in the rec room in front of whatever source of coolness they could find.

Four of them, the Engineer, Medic, Demoman and Soldier were all attempting to use fans to cool themselves off. The Engineer and Medic sat on the couch with a large square fan propped on the table in front of them, blowing warm air onto their faces. A rotating fan was the one the Demoman and Soldier got stuck with. Unfortunately for them, this fan would not cease its rotation no matter what they did. Being the idiots they were, the Demoman and Soldier decided to just follow wherever the fan's warm air moved to. They were shuffling together, following the fans exact movements.

The Spy and Sniper, much to their distaste, were both using magazines to fan themselves off. The animosity between the two was so great, that if they ever did something the other did, it would make them feel like the other, which they hated. The Sniper felt like the snotty, French asshole, while the Spy felt like a repulsive Australian bushman, copying each other's actions.

Not content with warm air, the Scout decided to take a more direct approach. He filled the sink up with ice cold water and was continuously dunking his head into it. This seemed to do the trick for him, at least for his head. The rest of his body was just as overheated as the Heavy, who attended to Sasha instead of himself.

Even though the Heavy was sweating profusely, he wasn't taking care of himself, rather, he was taking care of his beloved gun, Sasha. All the man cared about was keeping Sasha cool. He was constantly wiping her down with cold water, cleaning her as he did. The sweat he produced was so much, that the entire backside of the padded chair was soaking wet. None of this matter though, all that matter was that Sasha did not heat up.

The sweltering heat was so bad, that even the little firebug was attempting to cool itself of. Still refusing to take of the suit and mask, the Pyro lifted up his mask slightly and held a small fan up to the tiny crack between its mask and its suit. The other mercenaries had seen him lift the mask and attempted to get a glimpse on the things skin, but it was covered in the shadows.

The 9 mercenaries had been sitting there in silence, not wanting to waste their energy conversing with one another. Pulling his head out from the sink for the umpteenth time, the Scout finally broke the silence.

"Man this sucks! Why does the air conditionin' have to break now, in the middle of summer!" he complained.

"Boy, I already told you that it overheated. We're stuck without it for a few days." The Engineer said, wiping the sweat off his forehead.

"Well this sucks on ice! No, it sucks on melted ice!"

"I can't help that, now go back to what you we-"

The Engineer was cut off by the fans and lights shutting off, indicating one thing: a power outage.

"Oh all days, it had to be this one!" the Scout shouted.

"Zhis certainly in unfortunate. What are we to do with both the electricity and air conditioner out?" the Spy asked.

"Well, I did hear about a public pool down at town." the Engineer suggested.

"Loike that wouldn't be bloody strange, having 9 mercenaries show up at a pool just to cool off. Everybody would think we're trying to kill 'em." the Sniper said.

"Vell zhat seems like our best option right now." the Medic said, taking his glasses off and wiping them.

"I'm with ya lads!" the Demoman shouted.

"Well I guess we're mostly in agreement. Meet back here in 5 minutes, ready to go. Remember though, NO weapons!" the Engineer reminded them.

The Heavy frowned, he would have to leave Sasha behind in this scorching heat. He knew he had to put her some place cool, and with the power out, he knew that there was nowhere to place her. Out of options, he just sadly put her on his bed, gave her a kiss, grabbed his trunks, and left the room.

* * *

The 9 of them arrived to the Teufort Town Pool in two separate vehicles. Four of them were crammed into the Engineer's truck while the others had climbed into the Sniper's van for the trip. They got out of the vehicles and collected their belongings. If one were to see them, you wouldn't be able to necessarily tell that they were men who killed for a living...well most of them.

The Engineer's swim trunks were a dark brown, sporting a picture of Texas on the right side. He wore an old college shirt that had "Bee Cave Bee's" printed in black lettering across his chest. He lacked his signature yellow hard hat and goggles, choosing to leave them back at the base, but still wore his glove. Leaving the glove behind wasn't a choice. He needed to hide the weapon that replaced his right hand.

The Medic was in similar attire to the Engineer, wearing a shirt with his bathing suit. His suit was white in color with two red vertical stripes going down the side of his thighs. The T-shirt was pure white, seeing as how white was his favorite color, or favorite lack of. The only familiar article that he still wore, were his round glasses, which weren't for cosmetic purposes, as he actually required them to see properly.

Like the previous two, the Sniper had come wearing a pair of trunks and a shirt. The bottoms were red in color and sported little boxing kangaroos all over. A simple white shirt, almost identical to the Medic's, was big in size, reaching halfway down his thighs. He still wore his hat and aviator glasses, as he felt no need, or desire, to take them off.

The Scout decided to come dressed in only his normal pants. He lost the shirt, shoes, socks and hat with headset, and just wore his brownish gray pants. He felt the need not to wear a shirt, because he knew there would be ladies around to impress.

The Heavy was simply dressed in a pair of red trunks with pictures or a skull and cross bones printed multiple times across the cloth.

The Demoman wore a rather odd pair of swim trunks. This one seemed to dawn a red checkered kilt overlay that gave the appearance that he was wearing a skirt, much to the Scout's amusement. He still wore his eye patch that was now accompanied with a black short sleeved shirt.

The Soldier was planning to come with nothing but boxers on, but the rest of the team refused to let him come with them if he wore that. Through a dispute, the others finally got him to go put on a proper swim suit, which unfortunately, he did not have. The only person who had an extra suit, and much to his dismay, was the Scout. Since the Scout chose not to wear his suit to the pool, it was the only one left in the entire building, which forced it upon the Soldier. With the Scout being so small, the baseball styled suit didn't exactly fit the Soldier. It was tight and only covered half of his thighs, but a suit was a suit and the Soldier really wanted to escape the heat.

Out of the nine of them, the Spy and the Pyro were the most oddly dressed. The Spy wore nothing, but his balaclava and a red towel around his waist. Some of the mercenaries had questioned what he was hiding, being as how he was a man of mystery, but none of them were brave enough to ask. The Pyro, having to have its entire body covered, now dawned an old diver's suit that was colored dirty yellow. The other men were unsure if the Pyro was going to be let in or not, but they gave it a chance.

The mercenaries walked up to the entrance, stopping at the counter. A bored looking teenager was sitting there lazily, reading a gossip magazine. Their footsteps caught her attention, but she was too busy to look up

"Hi, welcome to the Teufort Town Pool. The entry fee is three dollars per person." she said, flipping the page of her magazine.

A bit surprised by this, the Engineer stood there with no money to pay with. He thought that it was just a community pool that would be free to access as long as you lived there.

"Hey do any of you have some money on you?" he asked.

The girl looked up, not amused by what she heard. A confused look appeared on her face as she looked at the men in front of her. It was certainly a strange group of men and that one in the back...was he wearing a diving suit?

"Uh, I'm sorry, but I don't think we allow that kind of clothing in here." she said, pointing at the Pyro.

The Heavy hadn't been paying attention to the girl, but just as the Engineer had requested, he pulled out a pile of cash and handed it to the young lady.

"Should be enough." he said.

The girl's eyes grew wide as she saw only one hundred dollar bills in the stack. She tried to give the large man his change, but he refused and let her keep the entire stack. Not questioning them any further, knowing that she could easily take some of this money for herself, she let the mercenaries in.

* * *

"Aww, sweet!" the Scout yelled in excitement.

"Merde..." the Spy sighed.

The Teufort Pool was astonishingly big for such a small town. The pool was in the shape on a shortened capital "T" that reached 50 yards on the longest stretch and 25 on the shortened part. On one side, there was a little shore that gradually went into the water, complete with water works, and on the other end was the deep end that reached 12 feet, complete with a two diving boards of different heights. At the bottom of the "T" was a small slide that seemed to be hogged by children in the four foot water.

He couldn't wait any longer. Immediately, the Scout ran towards the pool, full speed.

_Tweeet!_

"No running!" a lifeguard yelled.

Of course, the Scout didn't listen as he leaped into the pool with a surprisingly graceful front flip. Coming up for air, the Scout was only met with yet another whistle blow.

"Hey, you can't do flips!" a female lifeguard yelled.

Her voice caught the Scout's attention, causing him to look over to her. With a grin, he began to make his way over to the blonde lifeguard.

"Hey babe! You must have fallen from heaven. Are you an angel?" he said, flexing his muscles.

Scoffing and ignoring him, the lifeguard returned to her job. The Scout wouldn't give up that easily though, so he got out of the water and stood next to her stand, flexing his arms continuously and spouting horrible pickup lines.

"Zhat boy and 'is need for a woman." the Spy said, shaking his head at the flirting Scout.

The remaining mercenaries wandered the deck, trying to find a decent spot to set their stuff down. They had brought a cooler filled with non-alcoholic drinks, due to the rules they thought might be enforced there, a bag full of snacks, another that had each of the men's personal items stored in it, and a rather beaten up umbrella.

The search for a decent spot was all in vain. The crowd of people that had come before them already took up all the shaded spots and all that was left were spots where the sun was constantly beating down on it. A small corner near the deep end was their choice, away from most of the other visitors. They propped the umbrella along the fence and found four pool chairs that they dragged to their humble little spot.

Still watching the pathetic Scout, the Spy decided to relax for the time being and read. He pulled out the French novel he had brought, sat down, and paid attention to only the words on the page.

The Medic joined the Spy and pulled out an anatomy book that he had been meaning to finish. Now seemed as good a time as ever to finally finish the fascinating chapter on the liver of a monkey. Too worried about Sasha, the Heavy, sat there as well, thinking of the worst.

The rest of the mercenaries decided to go ahead and get into the pool, hoping to cool themselves off.

* * *

The Pyro received everyone's attention. Nobody could figure out why on earth someone would come to a public pool wearing an old diver's suit or, heck, even wear one in the first place. Most people thought that it must have been hiding something, but no one, not even the lifeguards, had the courage to ask. With everyone staring at it, the Pyro just walked into the water from the shore and sunk like a rock as he got deeper and deeper. People kept on staring for a few minutes, because the Pyro never came up for air. They knew it wasn't drowning because they could see it walking around on the bottom, so they decided that it was best to just ignore it.

The Demoman went straight for the high dive. He eagerly climbed the ladder, debating what to do. As he reached the top, the obvious choice hit him. Pulling back on the rail, the Demoman prepared to sprint.

Shooting forward, running as fast as he could down the narrow board, he jumped, landing on the end of the board and pushing off with enormous force. Flying high into the air, the Demoman curled up into a ball, holding his legs up to his chest, with wide grin of excitement on his face.

"CANNONBALL!"

_Sploooooosh!_

He entered the water with so much force, that, essentially, a small tidal wave was created, drenching everyone within a 20 foot radius, including the mercenaries peacefully reading their books.

The Medic and Spy were too involved in their books to notice the wave of water headed their way. All they knew was that one moment they were bone dry, with the exception of their own sweat, and the next, they were soaking wet.

"Merde!"

"Verdammnt!"

The two bookworms looked over to where the splash had been created and saw a smiling Demoman surface.

"DEGROOT!" they yelled in unison.

"Ye pansies should be gettin in the water like the rest o' us!" he yelled at them.

"Leave us to our books!" the Medic shouted in anger.

"As ye wish." he said, swimming away from them.

The two, accompanied by a worried Heavy, were left to dry of their books. Unfortunately for the Medic, his book had been soaked to the point of being unreadable.

"Verdammnt! Now zhere is nozhing to read! I might as vell get in das Schwimmbad..." he said, defeated by the Demoman.

Luckily for the Spy, his novel was not as bad as the Medic's, so he was able to continue reading. The Heavy, noticing the Medic was leaving, got up and followed him like a lost puppy.

* * *

The Soldier had heard the splash from the opposite side of the pool. He had turned around to see the small tidal wave that he knew could only be produced from that crazy Cyclops.

"Hehe...Degroot you bastard." he muttered, marching into the pool.

All the Soldier did was stand there, completely still in four feet deep water. The man in an army pose, stiff as a board, certainly did catch people's attention, but like the Pyro, they ultimately decided to ignore him.

For a while, Doe stood there like a statue, monitoring the pool for any civilians in need of help.

_Tweeeeeeeet!_

The high pitched noise caught his attention as he found himself looking at the source. A female lifeguard had just spotted a drowning victim and was about to take action.

What the girl thought would just be a normal old save, was sorely mistaken.

The Soldier spotted the drowning kid and immediately took action. He ran through the water as fast as he possibly could and grabbed the flailing kid, lifting him out of the water and putting him on the ledge of the pool. The lifeguard had already jumped in and was not happy that some random man had saved the helpless kid, and not her.

"Sir, it's my job to save anyone who is drowning." she said, angry at him.

"You were not fast enough, maggot. If I hadn't gotten to him as fast as I did, he could have drowned!" he yelled, frowning at his disapproval of her lack of swiftness.

"Sir, the lifeguards are supposed to be the ones to save drowning people, not some random civilian such as y-"

"What did you call me!" he bellowed.

The Soldier was about to wring this young girl's neck when a voice called out to him.

"Doe! What are ye doin?"

"I was just about t-"

"Leave the poor lass alone. Come on, let's go get somethin to drink." the Demoman said, ushering the Soldier his way.

Unwillingly, the Soldier left the girl with a warning.

"For your information, I am not a CIVILIAN, I am a SOLDIER of the United States and don't you forget that! I'll be keeping my eye on you, maggot!"

Backing away, pointing at his eye towards the girl, the Soldier followed the Demoman back to their spot.

* * *

"Bloody idiot..." the Sniper muttered under his breath, looking over at the Soldier.

Choosing to stand in the kiddie area was not the smartest decision. The little kids that were playing around him, splashed water everywhere and especially loved to splash him. While they were having their fun, he was not.

Annoyed, the Sniper finally moved to a deeper section where the little buggers couldn't even touch the bottom.

His habit to survey his surroundings (partially out of attentiveness and paranoia) caused him to look in every direction. Careful to notice every little meaningless detail, The Sniper looked into the deeper water, where he noticed the blurry outline of the submerged Pyro. At least he finally knew the thing could breathe, because he saw bubbles form and pop where the surface above him was.

The Sniper just stood there against the wall, as peaceful as could be. Well as peaceful as one could in a pool full of screaming kids. At least he was away from his teammates. He definitely needed a break from some of those nut jobs.

* * *

The Engineer noticed the Sniper across the pool and could tell he was deep in thought. Deciding not to bother him, the Engineer leaned back on the wall and propped his arms up on the ledge.

"Ah...this is nice." he mumbled, closing his eyes.

Despite the cacophony of voices surrounding him, it was still quite relaxing having half of his body submerged in cool water. The Engineer just stood there, content with his situation.

"May I join you, Herr Engineer?"

He sighed, he knew the "silence" wouldn't last.

"Go right on ahead, and please call me Dell. We aren't at work, so there's no need for titles," the Engineer said.

"Danke, Dell." the Medic said, slipping into the water to the right of his comrade.

"So, what's up? I thought you were over there readin some book on anatomy?"

"Ah, vell zhe Demoman destroyed zhe book vith his cannonball." the Medic said, annoyed at Degroot's action.

"Too bad, was probably interesting." the Engineer replied with little interest in his voice.

"Ja, quite fascinating information." the Medic said, longing for his destroyed book.

Having nothing more to say, the two just stood there, enjoying each other's company for the most part. The Engineer had really wanted to be left alone, but he had no problems with the Medic joining him. The German's company was never one that he despised.

Splash!

"What the-" the Engineer said, looking over to where the water and sound had come from.

To the left of the Medic stood the Heavy. It seemed as though he had just plopped in next to his friend, following him just as he always did.

Always believing that three was a crowd, the Engineer and decided to just leave the two alone.

"Hey, fellas, I'm gonna go get something to drink. I'll see you around." he said, slipping out of the pool and heading to their little corner.

* * *

The Soldier blindly grabbed a drink out of the cooler and began chugging it down. The entire can empty, he threw it to the ground, sighing with satisfaction.

"That was a damn good soda!"

The Demoman, having just taken a Manns, looked to the can that the Soldier had just carelessly thrown on the ground.

"Ye know ye just drank one of the Scout's Bonk's, right?"

Wide eyed, almost as if irony was at its finest that day, the soda's effects began to take effect on the Soldier. He twitched as the sugar ran through his blood stream.

"Suddenly I feel like running a hundred miles!" he yelled, high off of the massive amounts of sugar contained in the drink.

The Soldier sprinted out of the pool and into the park surrounding it. He was running around the park's track at an alarming rate. The Demoman watched for a few minutes, surprised and confused, before heading back to the diving board.

Walking up to their spot, the Engineer caught a glimpse of the Soldier running laps, confusing him as to what he was doing.

"What in tarnation I-"

"Bonk." the Spy quickly replied, not even looking up from his book.

"Well that explains everything." he said, mesmerized at how fast the middle aged man was running.

"Oui."

"You know, you should really go for a dip. You're sweatin like a pig." the Engineer said, looking at the sweat that drenched the Spy's chest.

Sighing and standing up, "Fine..."

The Engineer opened the cooler and was searching around for a non-Bonk soda. He found his soda and began to look back up.

"You should b-"

The Engineer was at a loss for words as he looked back up. His eyes shot open and his jaw dropped as he saw the one thing he never ever wanted to see in his life: a naked Spy.

"What?" the Spy cluelessly asked.

"Y-Yo-, uh..."

He couldn't speak. All the words he had wanted to yell out turned to mush when they reached his lips. The only thing he could think to do was an irrational action.

Without warning, the Engineer tackled the Spy to the ground in a desperate attempt to cover him up.

"What zhe hell are you doing?!" the Spy yelled in anger.

Finally being able to form words again, the Engineer spoke his mind.

"What the hell are YOU doing?! You can't go around to public places in your birthday suit!" he yelled quietly to the Spy beneath him.

"What? Zhis is common in France." the Spy said, still angry that he was being pinned to the ground.

"Well this ain't France, frenchie! Here in America, being naked is not something we do! You best put some damn clothes on before you get all of us kicked out!"

"Fine! I brought and extra suit just in case."

"Excuse me!"

The two men looked behind them to see an angry lifeguard staring at them with confusion and annoyance. Realizing the position they were in, the mercenaries faces turned beat red. Forgetting why they were in this position in the first place, the two hastily got up, causing the lifeguard's face to mirror what the Engineer's had shown. Finding her words, and seething with rage, she spoke.

"Get out, now!" she yelled.

"Mademoiselle, I apologize, but as you can tell I am not from around 'ere. My customs are different from yours, as I was not aware zhat zhis was not allowed." The Spy said calmly, grabbing the extra suit from the bag.

"Oh come on, really Spy?!" the Engineer said, slapping his hand onto his face as he saw the kind of suit the Spy was talking about.

"What?" the Spy asked innocently again.

"A Speedo?! Seriously?!" he yelled in frustration.

"What?!" he asked, slipping on the speedo that resembled the French flag, "I don't see what your problem is now."

"Hey!" the lifeguard yelled.

The two's attention was brought back to the young lifeguard, whose face was red with anger.

"I told you to get out! Take the rest of you weirdoes, and get out! Don't ever come back!"

At this point, the entire population of the pool was staring the the three. From their stares alone, it seemed as if a few had seen the Spy's naked body, and were not happy in the slightest. Parent's with disapproving looks covered their child's eyes, while a few were on the verge of bursting out laughing.

Angry, the Engineer began gathering their stuff.

"RED's! We gotta go! Spy got us kicked out!" he yelled across the pool.

Angry grumbles from the rest of the mercenaries could be heard, as they migrated towards the Engineer. Unaware of what had happened, they began asking questions when they came to carry their stuff out. All their questions were answered with one stern reply from the Engineer.

"The SPY, will explain it later!"

Silencing the group, the Engineer realized they were missing two.

"Where the hell are the Soldier and Pyro!"

_Bubble, bubble_

"Huddah, huddah!"

The Pyro popped out of the side of the pool, looking at the Engineer in confusion.

"We gotta leave. The Spy got us thrown out!" he said angrily, looking over at the Spy with a scowl.

"Do you 'ave to say it was my fault every time?!"

"Yes! Now shut up and find the Soldier!"

"Uh, hey I think I found him." the Scout said.

The Engineer looked at the Scout who was pointing to an unconscious Soldier lying on the track.

"Damn it, Soldier! Heavy w-"

"Da."

The Heavy exited in front of them and went to go collect the previously sugar rushed Soldier.

The rest of the group followed him out, receiving angry looks from both patrons and employees. They headed for the two vehicles and began loading up their stuff into the Engineer's truck. The Heavy returned with the Soldier thrown over his shoulder, asking where to put him.

"Just put him in the back of the truck. I don't give a fuck right not." the Engineer said, starting up his truck.

The Scout and Pyro climbed into the cab of the truck with the Engineer, while the rest piled into the van with the Sniper. Everyone pissed off at the Spy, the two vehicles drove off back to the base in silence, waiting for the explanation they were promised when they got back.

* * *

**Alternatively, you can imagine the Sniper in an Australian flag speedo.**

**If the pool seems a bit descriptive, that's because it's mostly based on a pool I'm overly familiar with.**

**Sorry for that mental image that I probably put into your brain, but a least it's funny, right? I mean other than disturbing it's funny. Actually you can thank my grandma for the naked Spy idea. It was her fault in the first place. I only came up with the speedo part and couldn't stop laughing. For such a goodie two shoes woman, that was certainly a surprising thing for her to say.**


End file.
